As parents and caregivers we are always looking for ways to positively motivate our children to strive to improve and set goals so they can achieve and reach their stars.
There are many techniques and methods that we can use to represent ourselves as being the best version of us, and living our best life. But, some days or weeks that’s not always the case due to external dilemmas or situations that may be occurring within our life.
In the recent Commonwealth Games we marvelled at the tremendous results of many great athletes. How they became champions and overcame adversity in their lives is often as courageous as their feats in the pool and on the sporting fields. Kyle Chalmers is a gold medalist swimmer in the Olympics, European Championships and the Commonwealth Games breaking 4 Australian age records. Chalmers was accused of being a jilted lover and ignoring another teammate in post-race celebrations, which had an impact on his mental health. Nevertheless, Chalmers commented, “You can try and bring me down all you want but it’s only going to last so long, and I will stop talking to the media”. Even though his demeanour and self-esteem were down and impacting his mental capabilities, this did not stop Chalmers to be the best version of himself by continuing to compete and winning more races.
As we work with our Woodville High School students to Reach for the Stars here are some tips on how to set goals and achieve our dreams.
How to Become the Best Version of Yourself
- Visualise your Future Self
Firstly, think about yourself in 10 years’ time, what does her and him look like, what goals have you achieved, and what are you capable of what? In order to help yourself visualise your future self, write a note or letter aiming around 10 to 20 short-term and long-term goals that can be attainable achieved down the road. Doing this will really help you get a feel for the personality you can develop with patience and practice.
- Tackle Your Goals
When tackling your goals, short-term goals are perfect to get started with in order to complete quickly to build confidence. With each goal you achieve, you will be one step closer to learning how to be your best self. Each goal achieved, you will gain momentum with each goal, which will motivate you towards the next goal. Some goals may take months and sometimes even years, these long-term goals will be easily achieved with the skills and motivation from achieving your short-term goals earlier with ease.
- Ensure Your Goals Match Your Purpose
It’s always good to remember that each goal should have a purpose to them, this may change with goals changing in the future. Take some time at least once a month to ensure that your goals are still pointing you in the direction of your priorities and life purpose. If they’re not, take some time to alter your goals and plan your goal to the purpose to be achieved.
- Offer Yourself Unconditional Love
In order to improve yourself, you must accept where you are today, wholeheartedly, without judgement or criticism. Unconditional love can be achieved by stepping away from the status quo and if you fall back, recognise where you went wrong, offer yourself positive, supportive thoughts and push yourself forward once again.
- Stop the Fear of Failure
Every day you will fall down, worry about what people say or think about you or feel judgement from others. This is all normal reactions around the fear of failure, it’s important to acknowledge that failure is a natural part of all areas of your life, and it doesn’t signal the end of the world. Highly successful people in the world, friends or family members have experienced failure throughout their lifetime, although failure becomes valuable insights that can drive you to become highly successful in life.
- Stop Procrastinating
Procrastinating can stop you from achieving your goals and derail your achievements in your life. To stop procrastination, make your actions precise and calculated, have some form of accountability, and set your goals up in a way in which they are small, manageable, and easily achievable.
- Stop People Pleasing
Does, “I want everyone to like me” or “I’d rather go along with the pack than stand my ground”. These people pleasing descriptions need to stop before it starts damaging your self-confidence or ambitions in your life. Start putting your feelings and outlooks on life, this will ultimately make you feel better and happy in the end.
- Stop Criticising and Judging Others
To become the best version of yourself, you need to eliminate all negative energy from your life. When you start judging or criticising others or peers you are throwing negative energy towards them, this can be damaging their self-worth and self-esteem, and destroy your representation of yourself. Avoid criticising and judging others by not assuming anything; know it’s not about you and pretend to walk in their shows to see the situation from their perspective.
- Stop the Negative Self-Talk
Self-talk is a normal process we all experience, but once it becomes filled with irrational ideas that are negative, then there’s a problem. The negative talk that occurs inside your head is 100% worse than it may appear in the outside world. Silencing the inner critic and putting a positive pin on things are two of the best ways to eliminate negative self-talk.
The Top Best Ways for Self-Improvement and Self-Growth
- Overcome Your Fears
Recognise your fears, reflect areas where you can grow as they act as a compass pointing at areas that need attention. The resource below is a article for parents detailing how you can help your child through the difficult time overcoming their fears. Resource: https://childmind.org/article/help-children-manage-fears
- Create a routine in the morning
Having a set routine in the morning will set you up for success throughout the day, accomplish little tasks, such as, making your bed, brushing your teeth, making recess and lunch will have a profound positive outlook towards your future goals. The following resource is for adolescents and how to set up a daily routine effectively. Resource: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_58mqaWgIaM
- Write a letter to your future self
Each person imagines what the future will look and what kind of person they will be. Writing a letter to your future self is the perfect way to see from your own words what has changed from one year ago or five years ago. The following resource is for adolescents to write a letter, add their email address and select how far into the future they would like the letter to be received back. Resource: https://www.futureme.org/
- Get out of your comfort zone
Your comfort zone is a good way to identify what you like and what you don’t like. The resource below is for parents dealing with their children having a hard time with their anxiety or depression to come out of their comfort zone Resource: https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/mental-health-physical-health/stress-anxiety-depression/anxiety
- Ask for Feedback
Asking for feedback gives everyone an additional perspective as you learn how to improve yourself. The following resource for parents is to learn more about how their children can ask for feedback. Resource: https://kidpreneurs.org/teaching-kids-to-give-and-receive-effective-feedback/
- Acknowledge your flaws
Everyone has flaws, but what’s most important is to understand them, acknowledge them, and address them through self-improvement practices. The resource below is to assist parents in helping to identify their children’s flaws. https://raisingchildren.net.au/pre-teens/mental-health-physical-health/about-mental-health/ups-downs
- Avoid negative people
To avoid people, you don’t like in a school or sport setting can become very difficult at times, learning the skills to not react or engage are key to building healthy relationships. The following resource are for adolescents to read up on peer pressures look like. https://kidshelpline.com.au/teens/issues/peer-pressure-and-fitting
- Reduce the time you spend online (social media/ apps) Having messaging apps open as a default result in a lot of wasted time. This time can be much better spent on other self- improvement activities. https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/screentime-teens.html#:~:text=Turn%20off%20all%20screens%20during,let